I want to be clear here that I come from a very close-minded upbringing on homosexuality, and I have very firm anti-homosexuality beliefs, but I hate to have these assumptions based on just my upbringing. But I am also aware, and somewhat refuse to believe, that there isn't some kind of logical explanation to why this happens. I am glad you pointed this out, because admittedly, I am one who believes that sometimes these are acts that people put up.
They are comfortable playing any role within the relationship. Many gay guys are what you'd call "versatile". But that's just a misconception, based on the application of heteronormative sex-gender binaries to homosexual relationships. Many people feel that one person has to be "the man" and one person has to be "the woman". It's not an act, and they can't change or choose to act a different way.Īnyway, in my experience, I find that yes, it is possible to have a mixture of masculine+feminine, masculine+masculine or feminine+feminine relationships. Many feminine guys and masculine women just are. So, I guess I'm saying it can be more fluid than just masc/fem, if that makes sense.įirst, i know there was no other way to describe it, but I usually have a problem when people say some gay guys act "feminine" or "masculine", because it subconsciously implies that these people are "acting", or "putting on a show". A good analogy is "Coffee, with a little bit of cream" meaning that most of the time, most people wouldn't automatically assume I'm gay, but every so often I'll say something or something will happen and whoops, a manpurse just flies out of my mouth and whacks someone in the face. I tend to fall most of the time in the middle. It can be as situational, or non-situational as is necessary or required. And a lot of the time, people will express certain aspects of these things at certain times, and the other aspects at other times. Just as there are aggressive women and submissive men in het relationships, there can be aggressive fem guys and submissive masc guys. Gay relationships, at least in my experience, are a lot more similar to straight relationships than most people would realize. Let me preface my answer by saying I can only speak to my own experience and I don't want to imply that I speak for everyone. Does this mean that generally speaking, there has to be masculinity and femininity in a relationship for it to be successful? For the most part, I have seen gay couples whose partners are the opposite of them. Can a gay relationship be successful if both partners are feminine or both masculine? This is coming from a straight man with very little knowledge about why some gay men act feminine and flamboyant and why some gay women can be masculine and stern.